emptyness (cont')

7th dec , the day b4 tzu ji camp, feeling nervous, hope to find some new friends, sincerity n experience new things in the camp. Well, after the camp its a bit different from wat my dear dear cousin told me..One fine day i got a call from her n invited me to join the camp, then just din treat it seriously, n my dear dear cousin just tell me tat 1st day is learn bout myself, 2nd day learn bout filial, 3rd day bout recycling, then got pretty in the camp, so after she urge me for 2nd time, then i join the camp, since i have nth to do after exam, n the hall stay is till 11th, so i joined the camp.Maybe i just simply agree, so she oso din tell me much in detail..

8th dec, morning i was a bit in the rush, n dun have enough sleep,which is not good, coz i'll not get enough sleep during the camp,from past experiences.Was a bit late, but luckily managed to be punctual,just nice, 8.30am arrived at Pasir Ris MRT. Saw Tzu ji banner, then went to bus stop to wait for transport. Haha, when i got into the van then talk to the guy beside me, then only found out tat he's from the same school, my junior, yuan shen, 2 of his friends is from amcisa, n one of them is oso from the same school, the world is so small..so we arrived at the tzu ji hq, a bit shock wif the warm welcome, n saw my cousin, simply greet her then go, felt a bit weird to have a cousin in the camp..then when the camp started i was a bit shock wif the "rules n regulations" of the camp, wow so strict, n felt tat is a bit serious, a bit different from wat i expected, anyway i'm used to strict rules ,after being well trained by chong hwa independent hight school KL. Aftertat the camp started wif ice breaker, then the station game. One of the more memorable wan was the session which i have to write down wat i fear most, wow, tats a bit challenging, actually got 2 things i feared, one is to find a position in the big crowd, the other wan is to talk to gal(shy? no confidence? , i think both), but i just write down one,hmm, think no wan can help me to solve the problem, the problem only can be solve by myself, to join more activities..then follows by 2 session of sharing session,well i appreciate tat they share their views, but din concentrate much since i'm not used to the chair, couldn't sit there comfortably for too long, btw the sharings was a bit general, so i just listen a bit n daydream a bit..so the 1st day was okok..but the things is tat wat i found in the camp is tat friends in the camp are very helpful,warm n sincere, which was very different from wat i hate on my hall, n NUS, people who put on their mask, so this is the most beautiful things for tzu ji.

2nd day, tat day was much more interesting compare to 1st day. In the morning we went to visit a patient,well wat i've seen in the house is an empty house with a old uncle staying there.Hmm tis doesn't shock me much, since i saw a lot during the Garang Guni session for my hall flag, saw a lot of poor people in the HDB, yet they are still willing to donate their newspaper, old shirts n electrical appliances, wat n irony for the hall to waste $12,000 to build a float to win so many prizes, n to tear it off after rag day, n i was one of the raggers.Back to the home visit, the uncle was nth different from the outlook, n we chatted a short while wif him.Hmm he doesnt have friends n family, n he said tat he doesn't like to talk much..hmm i oso doesn't like to talk much in the crowd, n i'm not so close wif my brother n sister, so have to communicate more wif them.n luckily i've caring family, n friends.not many, but a few close friends.so hope tat the uncle will have a happy life. Nx was the video by a tzu ji senior from taiwan, i was really touched by his talk. He pointed out so many harsh truth, n i cried when i listen to the aghanism( dunno how to spell) song, with the translation.The lyrics are so meaningful,if i din remember wrong wan line talk about the destruction of the earth, n the photos of those poor souls, n the touching tune....

At night, we 1st have a short drama session about some stories bout filial.wow, i was borned to be stone, so my acting wasn't good, but wat i saw was the our group members n other groups was acting very well, natural, n bring out moral of the stories. After tat it was a videao screening session, well i saw some of the videos b4 during the performance by tzu ji in UCC, but i think they added one new story, a story which is like telling my story, n i started to cry (2nd time in tis camp),not stopping until i finished my letter,but i decided not to mail the letter to my parents, i've rejected every single activities during the holiday, to go home..so i'll stay together wif them for the holiday..btw i felt a lot better after writing the letter. So my 2nd day at camp is the most touching , most memorable day..

Last day of camp, hmm today felt a bit heavy n empty.Well sometimes i felt tat they showed to much video to promote the charity works, to me i dun need to watch so many videos, just a few, touching video, n i'll got impressed.too much video will make me feel uncomfortable.Guilty? or sometimes will feel tat like its not so good to promote the charity job too much, too much like will makes the charity work like to be done in purpose to let people noe, am i thinking to too much?haha, tats me , pieces.Well the lunch was the best vegetarian lunch i've every have, thanks those who serves us food n drinks during the camp, n the group leaders, who take care of our group during the entire camp. So it come to the final part, inauguration ceremony,hmm there were some religious part in tat, hmm, to me okok, since i'm non religious, felt a bit weird,anyway just follow the crowd.So tats the end of the camp..

Got some new friends from the camp, mostly from my groups, well i'm satisfied wif the camp,n thx my dear dear cousin for inviting me to join the camp, n those who prepared ,planned, put in effort in the camp to make it a good one. On the way back to hall, noe some friends from other group,how nice..n at night when yam cha wif a good friend from MSL, only noe tat many of them in tzu ji camp are her friends,the world is really small.....